You know there are 2 types of stupidity- there's 'stupid' and then there's FUCKING DUMB CUNT STUPID
heres a recent email a fellow photographer received---
"We have been showing my family/friends the pics you sent. They are so fun to look through... I'm really loving the pics around the city and all the partying on the dance floor.
I was really hoping you could help me out with something. I have expressed my concern to florist regarding this issue even though there is nothing that can be done to change at this point. I am concerned that I have a polka-dot effect in my bouquet. There are 2 hot pink roses that clash drastically with the ivory and other lighter shades of pink that were used. I only wanted the ivory roses, very light pink roses, and greens to create a more soft, subtle look. I am really keeping my fingers crossed that you can soften the hot pink in the photos. Particularly of the ones where I am walking in and out of church although if we can do to all where it seems more obvious, it would be tremendously appreciated. I am trying so hard to not let this ruin how beautiful everything turned out to be.
Look forward to hearing from you. Thank you so much"
Honest to fucking Jesus...are you kidding me? A couple of flowers brighter than she imagined for the last 3 years planning this fucking train-wreck of a wedding is NOW going to 'ruin' everything?
[I might add I have seen the aformentioned bouquet, and I can hardly tell what this crazy hooker is talking about]
I mean - how do you even process that in your head? All I keep thinking about is the poor new husband and the shit he is in for if this matrimony sham lasts for more than a year or 2. Why didn't she just yank the motherfuckers right out of the bouquet that day? And what good is telling the florist NOW several weeks after the event? I'll bet her cooter was wet the day of when all her stupid, dopey bridesmaids were OOOing and AHHing when the flowers arrived, declaring them the most beautiful thing on Gods Green earth. Now - suddenly - they suck.
I tell you what REALLY sucks now: YOU
I chalk this up to simple Wacky-Post-Wedding withdrawal, as now you actually have to live your boring day to day life rather than a manufactured fantasy-world. Now you are no longer a Princess each day. Now, not everyone is going to pay attention to you each and every second.
Now - you may have to acknowledge your husband.
So listen up Little-Miss-Fantasyland: just fucking get over it. There's nothing you can do now and there are more important Life Issue than the color of a couple of godamn flowers in your cheesy-ass Stop and Shop bouquet. No one noticed the day of. No one cared or cares. The wedding day is over.
And so is your poor husbands life.
