Although I’ve seen it before and shouldn’t be surprised,
this fucking ‘Nemo’ Disney motherfucking snowstorm has brought out Bridal Crazy
to a new degree. Brides who think – even though it’s one of the ‘worst snow
storms in history’, that their special fucking day deserves to go on. The same
thing happened with Hurricane Sandy and whatever the previous fucking Hurricane was
called. I recall photographers driving THROUGH DOWNED POWER LINES (I’m not
kidding) in order to get to some shitball venue for some selfish brides fucking
shitball wedding.
Who thinks this way? What self-centered planet do these
cunts come from that they put their vendor, and guests well-being at risk, so
they can stand around in their stupid $899.95 wedding dress serving shitty,
rubbery chicken products? How Special they are--How dare they!
And with Nemo we’re at it again; assholes who – despite HALF
their guests not making it – still insisting the Show Must Go On. I read online
about brides not having makeup people show, DJ’s bailing and half the crowd not
making it. Really? And you're surprised, you fucking tool? There’s 3 feet of snow
outside, you cunty douche.
And for what?
So the photographer whose life you put in danger can take
photos of all of your stupid, ‘unique details’ you copied off of fucking
Pinterest. You know the ones: the same details she photographed at the last 12
weddings in a row.
To get photos of all the crap you bought off ETSY – no doubt
a dress hanger with your new last name twisted in some scrap metal. What
happens to those fucking hangers afterwards any? I’m betting Honeymoon night
emergency bathroom abortions in Aruba– but I digress….
So people can gawk and wish you fake compliments about how
unique that cheapo dress you skimped on looks on you, and how they really 'didn't notice' your Pillsbury biscuit backfat?
To make them endure a 60 minute mass that no one will recall
the moment they leave?
To force them to sit and ‘enjoy’ your reception as they
worry about the condition of their homes you forced them to leave?
How excited they are to get a 99 cent picture frame from
Christmas Tree Shops as a ‘gift’!
It’s rude and thoughtless. And by the way – when your ETSY
abortion goes bad, don’t call me.
I’m certain I’ll be busy…..
