a camera is a new thing and time travel

......at en event the other day while photographing a family, the mother discovered that I had been at a similar event the evening before.

"OH! You were at THAT too?"

"Yes!" I answer.

"Are the photos online yet?"

"Uhhh, It ended at midnight..." I said frowning.

"Ahhh well..."- she says, "I guess i'll let it slide THIS time."

Seriously? I am considering researching the mind-transfer of images immediately online , similar to Jeff Goldblum in The Fly, so these fucking cunts can be satisfied. Maybe I can even get the images online BEFORE I take them..how would that suit you, sister? Better for you? More convenient for you to view in between Botox injections?

Oh wait--you will be one of those that badger me for images and then wait a year to order a single 4x6. HipHipHurray - i can go buy a Snickers bar with your generous purchase.

ON another note - at the same event...and i KNOW that I have mentioned this before - just as I go to take the shot, the Zanax'd up Mom blankly looks at me and says "Where should I look?"

thats right:

Where

Should

I

Fucking

Look

I mean - is THIS what she was seeing in her prescription drug induced haze?:

Is it 18 fucking 39? For fucks sake - you look at the FUCKING CAMERA YOU DIZZY BITCH!!!

Jesus, mary and joseph--- I swear sometimes i think the world is ending one dummy at a time.

whats the deal with wedding 'photo booths'?

I really don't fucking get it---this trend that everyone wants a crappyass 'photo booth ' at their wedding. And when I say photobooth i don't mean the 'traditional' box you sit in and knock off a few shots that at least has a cool, traditional feel. I'm talking about the hung backdrop, shoved in a corner, distracting cheeseball setup and general bad behaviour. It's a WEDDING for Christ's sake, not a 6 year olds birthday party.

Now I have seen some cool ones - where you get neat shots of guests where it's fun and done tastefully...but it's the godamn props and drunken activities that kill me.

Stupid fucking feather boas.

Stupid fucking inflatable instruments.

Stupid fucking sparkle hats.

Stupid fucking goofy eyeglasses.

Stupid fucking Party Fucking City prop shit.

Stupid fucking fuckedy fuck fuck---awww fuck it. It fucking sucks.

Come on people----

Where has good taste and simplicity gone to? You're going to spend $50,000 on a wedding only to cheapen it with low-brow props and guys pretending to ass fuck each other the drunker they get? Mom and Dad making 'gang signs'? Brazen wasted bridesmaids threatening to expose their tits and pretend they are lesbian 'Charlie Angels' once they're on their 16th wine spritzer? Grandma like a geriatric Girl-Gone-Wild with her tongue sticking out like a panting dying dog licking a groomsman's face. Do I want to see this? Will your KIDS want to see this? THIS is a wedding these days?

While an unpopular point of view i'm sure, I hope that one day very soon we will look back, in the same way we do now with 'touch of color' photos and white faux-leather albums with gold cameos on the cover, and say - "what the fuck were we THINKING"?